"The next best thing to being wise oneself is to live in a circle of those who are." ~ C. S. Lewis
For parents with students in Delaware Girls Circle and ILOLA Programs: Guidelines and Ground Rules
Following are some basic guidelines and ground rules for helping to make the Point of Tangency a success. They are followed by common questions Arcs may have about both their role and that of the Tangent. If you have questions at any time, please contact your Ringleader or Program Sustainability Manager.
Guidelines and Ground Rules
- Please do not ask your Point's Tangent to provide transportation, buy presents, be the disciplinarian, or babysit for your family. The Tangent’s role is to be a companion to the Point.
- Please don’t discuss your Point with the Tangent in the presence of your Point. If you think there is something the Tangent should know, call her when your Point is away.
- Try to let the Tangent know, once in a while, that her efforts are appreciated, and please help your Point be considerate of the Tangent (e.g., remembering her birthday, making occasional phone calls).
- Remember, the relationship that exists is between your Point and the Tangent. Please don’t ask that you or siblings be included on outings, and try to avoid excessive quizzing about their visits, so that your Point can enjoy having her special friend. However, if you feel uncomfortable with any aspect of the match, or if something about the relationship concerns you (i.e., your Point is acting secretive or unusual in regard to the match), contact your caseworker immediately.
- The Delaware Girls Circles strictly discourages overnight stays for the first three months of the match. Exceptions to this include DGC-sponsored activities, such as conferences, campouts and raft trips. These activities are supervised by staff members of the DGC.
- Forgive minor mistakes in judgment. The Tangent is neither a trained professional nor perfect. You will probably disagree with her sometimes.
- Please don’t deprive your Point of the weekly visit with her Tangent as a means of discipline.
- The Tangent will tell you when she plans to pick up and return your Point. Please make a point of being home at these times and call the Tangent if your plans change.
- Tangents are encouraged to plan activities that are free or low cost, but we ask that you contribute what you can to the cost of your Point's visit with her Tangent.
- Scheduling the times for the weekly visit can sometimes be difficult, so please be flexible.
- The mentoring relationship needs time to develop — at least three months — so don’t judge it too quickly; give it time.
- Notify the DGC when you have a change of phone number or address.
- Please keep in mind that all information is confidential and should be shared only with your caseworker.
- The success or failure of a match depends on the cooperation of all the individuals concerned. It is important to discuss your Point's Tangent with your caseworker periodically to prevent problems and to keep the caseworker updated. We want your Point to have fun and to grow positively from the match.